[yes this is all in caps]

[thisisyourgod]

ALRIGHT YOU RIDICULOUS NOOKSNIFFERS WITH ALL YOUR FUCKING YELLOW FACED SMILES. LISTEN UP. I'M LOOKING FOR SOME IMPORTANT FRIENDS OF MINE AND YOU'RE GOING TO FORK THEM OVER OR I WILL FIND SOME MEANS OF BEING MORE THREATENING THAN THIS PREHISTORIC WRITING UTENSIL WILL ALLOW.

NORMALLY THIS WOULDN'T BE A PROBLEM, BUT IF I'M A SQUISHY PINK HUMAN LIKE THE REST OF YOU THAN THEY PROBABLY ARE TOO AND I CAN HARDLY TELL ONE OF YOU LOAD GAPER DRINKERS APART FROM ANOTHER ONE. YOU HEAR THAT, ASSHOLES? IF YOU'RE OUT THERE YOU BETTER RESPOND TO THIS SO I CAN FIND YOU. THIS ISN'T JUST SOME RANDOM MEMO FOR US TO ARGUE IN LIKE A BUNCH OF FUCKNUTS. YOU KNOW, LIKE JUST ABOUT EVERY OTHER THING I POST FOR EVERYONE TO SEE, APPARENTLY. THIS IS SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS.

OH MY GOD WHY IS SHE EVEN STICKING SMILES ON THE PAPER? WHAT THE SHIT. KNOCK IT O`---

Comments

[sixth_attack]

What's their names? I've helped someone find one of their friends before. I could keep an eye out for 'em.


[Added as afterthought]

Then again, you might not want to see them as fellow prisoners here or brainwashed "visitors" though, just warning ya.

[thisisyourgod]

THERE'S A LOT OF THEM AND MORE KEEP SHOWING UP. I DON'T WANT TO GIVE OUT NAMES.

THEY'LL BE LIKE ME. THEY'RE TROLLS.

[sixth_attack]

Trolls?! [scribble] You and your friends are trolls? You mean like some of those mutants you find in the sewers or something?

[thisisyourgod]

SEWERS?

WHAT THE FUCK IS A SEWER?

[Two can speak this language! xD]

[sixth_attack]

You don't know

You didn't answer my

SEWERS ARE THOSE PIPES UNDER CITIES THAT MOVES SHITTY WATER AND SLUDGE AROUND. THAT RING A BELL FOR YA?

[thisisyourgod]

WHY WOULD WE WANT TO LIVE ANYWHERE LIKE THAT? THAT'S DISGUSTING.

[sixth_attack]

OK THEN. SO YOU'RE NOT WHAT I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE. JUST WHAT KIND OF TROLL WERE YOU BEFORE?

[thisisyourgod]

HOW MANY DIFFERENT KINDS OF TROLLS DO YOU THINK THERE ARE?

[sixth_attack]

I DON'T KNOW! YOU TELL ME! THERE'S CRAP LOADS OF DIFFERENT KINDS OF PEOPLE STUCK HERE.

[thisisyourgod]

WELL I'M NOT THAT KIND OF TROLL. I AM A FAR SUPERIOR KIND OF TROLL.

[sixth_attack]

REALLY? WHAT MAKES A SUPERIOR TROLL SUPERIOR? DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH FIGHTING SKILLS?

[thisisyourgod]

IT HAS TO DO WITH MY RACE CONQUERING GALAXIES.

AND BECAUSE I FUCKING SAY SO.

[sixth_attack]

SO YOU'RE FROM A RACE OF SUPER TROLLS WHO TAKE OVER GALAXIES AND SAY "NOOKSNIFFERS" A LOT, HUH?

SOUNDS COOL. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

[thisisyourgod]

LET'S GO WITH THAT. SURE.

IT'S KARKAT.

[sixth_attack]

OK, KARKAT OF THE SUPER TROLLS! YOU CAN CALL ME SECHS!

[thisisyourgod]

SERIOUSLY.

THAT'S SERIOUSLY YOUR NAME.

[sixth_attack]

YEAH IT IS.

WHAT? YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?

[thisisyourgod]

I AM NOT CALLING YOU THAT OUT LOUD IN PERSON.

[sixth_attack]

WHAT? EVERYONE ELSE CALLS ME THAT.

IF THAT'S HOW YOU'RE GONNA BE, THEN HOW 'BOUT I CALL YOU SOMETHING ELSE LIKE [pen taps] "KARROTCAKE"?

[thisisyourgod]

NO, BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE STUPID. THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH MY NAME.

[sixth_attack]

THEN CALL ME SECHS OR ELSE IT'S "SWEET MR. KARROTCAKE" FOR YOU FROM NOW ON.

[thisisyourgod]

FINE, BUT IF WE EVER MEET IN PERSON I'M GOING TO MISPRONOUNCE IT ON PURPOSE.

[sixth_attack]

HAVE IT YOUR WAY THEN, KARROT McKRABBYCAKES!

[thisisyourgod]

OH MY GOD YOU'RE SUCH A WIGGLER.