[Small Decepticon symbol sketch]

Sight's back. There's other complications but I'm fine with seeing.

Also, welcome to HK-47. Just wanted to give you a friendly reminder that I outrank you.

--Scourge

To Lord Lug Evil EVERYONE:

That was not me yesterday. There is no Joshua, Joshua is not me and doesn't exist and even if he did exist he wouldn't be me. Ignore everything I said, especially the really really stupid things.

Also please don't kill me.

-Scourge (not Joshua!)

To Megatron and Lord Recluse:

I hereby resign from your respect employs. It's not you, it's me, you've been great guys but I've gotten a better offer from the Department of Sanity and I just don't feel we're working out.

Sincerely,

"Scourge".

[Doodle of a spider, in the traditional 'two ovals plus eight legs' style]

Got any jobs for me tonight? Am willing to make another trade and the boss hasn't handed me down anything yet.

-S

[Edit: Entire post has been removed.]

Lord M,

I found someone who might be useful. Can you meet me and him after lunch in the Sun Room? Not sure what you look like, but I'll be the one with the pink claws and the beard. Hard to miss.

-S

[The note is crude and spelled rather badly. Occasionally the lines run into the edges of the page or slope downwards before coming up again. There are a few lines where the pen's been dragged along for a while before getting picked up again. It looks as if the note was written by someone who wasn't in possession of all their faculties, and for good reason.]

Bossss,

Got the trator, got him pretty good. Hes softened up for you and itsnt going to be walking very well, let alone running____ Sinc eall he can do best is run he won't be able to gdo very much to stop us. aAll yours now, buss.

-Scourge.

Sorry abour the writing, Took a hit from yhe nurses, some kind o___f prickand i'm all wobbly now. will see you later or somethigng.

[There are several lines of false starts, all scribbled out]

To robot-type people and anyone else with a lot of patience,

Will someone please give our great leader Lugnut some coherent, useful explanation of what happens when two mechs like each other very much and so on? I'm running out of ideas and I'd really like people to stop mocking to have one of Megatron's finest have all necessary information for dealing with our current situation.

Will pay in goods or services (at a reasonable rate) and my eternal gratitude for anyone who can do this.

[The above is later edited to correct Lugnut's status.]