[ANON. SO ANON.]

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

One Amazing Bird-Boy looking for a Xena, Uncle Ax, Fearless Leader, Tree-hugger, Curious George. Any of you guys here?

I've lost my feathers If Mr. Manipulation is behind this, we need to kick his multi-dimensional butt into last week. Twice.

Comments

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

Don't know yet. I haven't found anyone I trust enough to ask, C-3PO. What do you think that [arrow up towards his original post] was about?

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

That is a problem, you never know which ones are the alien shapeshifters come to steal your secrets. Be careful not to look them in the eyes, they steal your spark that way.

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

[there's several suddenly-alarmed scratched-out bits, and then a jerkily-written,]

Nah, the aliens don't shape-shift. They just force their way into your ear canal, squeezing past the bones and membranes, until they reach your brain-- and wrap around it-- and take over, leaving you shoved into a corner of your own mind as they go about your life, smiling and laughing and being you as you watch, screaming silently, unable to warn the people you love that they're in danger of being enslaved, too.

All they steal is your free will, your life, your hope.

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

[This one comes a bit later, as the writer has to have time to pick himself up off the floor]

Mindstealing alien earworms, slagging Pit. I can't even mock you for this, you're doing it all yourself.

(Although trust me, your alien friends don't want my life, free will's not worth much these days, and my hope went away a long time ago. The last guy who walked off with my body couldn't wait to get out of it.)

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

[Tobias's previous post has been taken down like whoa.]

Glad you're enjoying yourself, HAL.

(... Now this is a story I've got to hear.)

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

HAL?

...right, the red blinky light thingie with the singing. Humans make the weirdest movies. Do birds make movies?

(I'll tell you later, it's a long one and holding a pencil's hard enough as it is when you're not used to it.)

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

Naturally. (Ba-dum-ching.) Eagles always get the starring roles, though, the jerks. I don't get what gets chicks so hot over a six-foot wingspan.

(Huh. In person?)

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

Well, a bigger wingspan means more jet insulation, so of course it makes the chicks hotter. Doesn't seem to do a whole lot for my love life, though.

That was, in fact, a joke and not me taking you literally, so you can stuff any comments you might make assuming otherwise.

(If you want, I'm bored enough. My "bosses" are off doing something important, Primus knows what because I certainly don't want to.)

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

What kind of fictional alien transforming robot were you, anyway? The only robots I've ever met were more interested in playing with puppies than cruising for babes.

(Well, why not? Gimme a description and I'll come find you sometime.)

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

Oh, so you have met the Autobots.

We haven't got any babes in the Decepticons. At least, I don't think so. Some of the Seekers do make me wonder.

(Beard and hot pink claws. I'm hard to miss.)

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

... okay, that made me laugh. You're not so bad, aside from being loonier than a water fowl.

(... Hot pink nails? You sure it's girls you're looking for?)

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

Glad to have entertained you. The Autobots have babes, but they still keep going after Earth women. Autobots are strange.

(Not...really, no. Unless you're a girl. You got any defining traits besides imaginary feathers?)

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

Sounds like.

(The boy part of 'Amazing Bird-Boy' kinda rules being a girl out, I'd think. And, aside from feathers (imagined or otherwise), I'm a perfectly normal-looking human kid, last I checked.)

[haplesstracker.livejournal.com]

Another "joke", fluffball. Can you give me more to go on -- colors, voice, smell?

[There's a few hesitation marks as Tobias tries to decide what to say.]

[buteo-sapiens.livejournal.com]

Messy light-ish hair, grey eyes, grey clothes with a smiley on the front. Pretty nondescript without my plumage.