damned_bulletin | (no subject)

Dude, Robin stop being a paranoid freak? I don't think it's possible man.

Yeah, lunch is cool. What is it?

Yeah, I guess not. But I wanted to make the offer anyway. Hey, maybe we should make him a mask or something, so he won't feel so exposed or whatever his deal is. There's going to be arts and crafts later, right? It wouldn't be as good as...whatever his real mask is made out of (how does it stay on, anyway? Think he glues it to his face? Doesn't sound really comfortable) but I bet some construction paper and tape would do the trick!

That'd be really conspicuous though...I don't know, what do you think we should do?

Anyway, uh. Geez. I bet this must sound REALLY weird coming from me, but I don't think we should talk about it here, where everyone can see. It's not really the kind of thing I think we should let everyone know. You'll know what I mean when we talk about it. Frak, I'm starving...

So what did you do last night?

Yeah, we should totally make him a new mask or just stick a paper bag over his head. (He's gotta glue it on, there's no other way he could get it to stay on. If he had tactile telekinesis like me he could use that to keep it on but he doesn't.) We'd have to use lots of tape instead. I think it'd work.

OK... are you sure you're the real Impulse man? 'Cause I never thought you'd be the one getting all secretive.

Last night I helped a guy out. With a monster problem. It was ~~really good~~ a lot of fun. What about you man?

But if he uses glue, how does he take it off? He can't wear it ALL the time, he probably has to go to school and stuff like me. A paper bag would work though, and it doesn't sound too conspicuous. People would probably just assume he was really ugly or something.

YEAH, I'm the real Impulse! I just...I don't want other people to know about this, okay? It's embarrassing, and...well, what if there are supervillains or something stuck here too? It wouldn't make any sense for us to be the ONLY people from our universe, or from universes like ours. I even met this version of the Flash yesterday who's from a completely different universe! It was weird! Pretty awesome, but weird. Like you meeting a version of Superman who, I don't know, was married to Batman or something.

...Okay, maybe not that weird.

Oh, cool. What kind of monster was it? ~~How'd you fight it without your ttk working right?~~

I dunno. Probably. That's why I don't have a secret identity. Too much hassle man.

Exactly my point! If you're reading this Rob we'll get you a nice bag to stick over your head. Then you can be your normal freaky self.

Embarrassing personal problems? I'm not sure I wanna talk about that.

Uh, but yeah, there might be supervillains here I guess. I met some loser who works for Lex Luthor already.
What was this other Flash like? Did you get a lecture? I saw his note and it looked like he was totally gonna ream you man.

Superman has way too much taste to hook up with Batman. That would just be weird! Not that I want to think about who Superman hooks up with at all!

Uh, it's kind of complicated. We didn't fight it or anything.

You have no idea how lucky you are, seriously. You only THINK you know how big a hassle secret identities are. I lucked out though; the Flash I met was more interested in hearing about our dimension. It was kind of awkward though; you know how my Flash is such a huge jerk? This one kind of...isn't. I think he might even be a pretty nice guy. It's WEIRD, but kind of nice too, you know?

NOT THAT KIND OF PERSONAL PROBLEM! Geez. It's a...a powers issue, okay? Now shut up, we'll talk about it during lunch.

I can't get it out of my head now!

Who do you think would wear the dress?

Wait, I'm confused. You helped some guy out with a monster problem, but not by fighting it? How does that even work?

Yeah, and I don't want to find out for real how much of a pain they are. Really? He's OK? That's cool man. ~~I mean it would be kind of cool if Superman-~~

OK, OK, geez, chill!

.... NOT Superman! He's- It would just be weird! Weirder than the rest! Dude, I am so blaming you if I'm stuck seeing that for the rest of my life!

Like I said, it's complicated. You heard about the birds here, right?

Yeah, we talked for a while yesterday, and again last night. He's cool.

What, and somehow BATMAN in a dress isn't weird? Oh frak why did I just think that?

Birds?

I did not need to picture that! You suck Imp!

Oh man. How about I tell you later, 'kay?

Think the images will go away someday if we never ever mention this conversation again?

Okay? Now who's being the mysterious one?

They better or I'm so blaming you!

Yeah, but when I act mysterious it's sexy.

You say that about everything you do!

That's 'cause I'm hot no matter what I'm doing. I'm Superboy!

Too bad ego doesn't count as a superpower; you'd be the strongest meta around!

Whatever man. You wish you were half as awesome as I am.

....he was a jerk huh?

[several hesitation marks]

Was it really that bad?

FRAK. There has got to be a better way of getting messages to people! I, uh

I didn't actually mean it like that?

[quite a lot of hesitation marks on the paper. He probably agonised over answering for a whole MINUTE.]

...is that why you didn't want to talk about him?

...Maybe?

I, just. I was kind of hoping to avoid making you feel like THIS. Cause you've been really nice so far, you know? I didn't want to make you feel bad, especially cause it's not even your fault!

You shouldn't worry about it.

...I guess I can understand why. But it kinda... makes me feel worse that you didn't think you could talk about it.

I'm not him, you know?

I do know that, really! That's why I didn't want to talk about it. It wasn't that I didn't feel like I could, I just didn't want to. I'd rather get to know this version of you, you know?

Look, I...He is a jerk, okay? We REALLY don't get along, at all. But, objectively speaking, he really isn't THAT bad. His girlfriend seems to like him a lot anyway, and he's a pretty popular superhero. You shouldn't be beating yourself up about this. It's not like he kicks puppies for fun or anything.

...I guess. But I kinda hope that maybe one day you'll actually want to be honest with me about that. Even if I can understand why you aren't.

So I guess I won't bother you about it anymore until you want to talk.

But I am being honest. What else do you want to say?

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